No one can tell you if you and your partner are ready to get married. That is something only you can know. And although the people around you, as well as the larger world around you, all have opinions on gays getting married, you need to stay true to yourself. Marriage is intended to be a lifetime commitment, although you wouldn’t know it looking at the divorce rate of heterosexuals, the only people legally allowed to marry in the U.S. Although we are not legally allowed to marry, this should never stop two adults in love from starting a lifetime of happiness and commitment together. And of course, every time a homosexual couple gets married and stays married, it only proves our case more! So if you’re thinking of marrying you partner, make sure that it’s the right decision beforehand. Here are some tips on how to tell if you’re ready for that next step:
Live together first – Since many people consider, we’re “living in sin” anyway, there’s no reason not to move in with you partner first as a sort of “test run”. Although you can get to know someone by dating them for several years, you never really know someone until you live with them and have to justly share your day-to-day life with someone. And once gay marriage is officially recognized, it will be much easier to move out than to get a divorce.
Write a list – Think about what spending the rest of your life with your partner would really be like. Take the time to write a list of all the good things as well as all the challenges that would come of it. Consider both the pros and cons to the marriage and most crucially whether it’s a good move for the both of you. When you are through, burn the list so that your partner will never find it and have their feelings hurt. Seriously, burn the list.
Think about it – Marriage is not a game and you should not make rash decisions. You have your whole life to get married, so make sure you’ve really thought about it. What are your reasons for getting married? Do you and your partner have problems that you’re currently struggling with? Are you trying to use marriage as a mean to stop your on-going problems? Do you want to get married to prove a point either to your family or to society? Because if these are your reasons then you need to take a huge step back and look at the situation judgmentally.
Love isn’t enough – Sorry to say but true. One can love many people in a lifetime. And many of the people we love, aren’t really good matches for us. Examine your partner. Do you trust him or her? Is your partner the kind of character you can always depend on? Will your partner play a part equally to building a home and a life collectively? Many people feel that if they love someone marrying that person is the “next step.” However, marriage should not be based just on the fact that you love your partner. You should want to spend the rest of your life with you partner and be ready to tell the world just that.
To conclude, one should by no means jump into a marriage on impulse. Take some time to analyze and examine what you expect out of the marriage before you commit. It should be a lifelong choice and commitment and should be taken seriously.